Emotional Intelligence for Better Relationships and Decision-Making
Emotions Are Important—Ours and Others’
Some people work hard to be “the smartest person in the room.” Doing so may involve education like getting one or more advanced degrees from prestigious schools. Or it may be building experience in business, politics, community service or another field. Almost always, the desire to be respected for extreme intellect is based on “head smarts.”
Rarely, if ever, do individuals want to be “the smartest person in the room” based on emotional intelligence. This is unfortunate, because emotional intelligence, or “EQ,” can be as important as, or even more important than intellectual intelligence, in determining one’s success in life.
Many factors describe one’s EQ. These include:
Self-awareness: Awareness of one’s own feelings and recognizing how one’s emotions affect others.
Self-control: Having the ability to keep disruptive emotions and impulses in check and is effective in stressful or hostile conditions.
Awareness of others: Sensing and being interested in other’s feelings and perspectives and picks up on social cues to understand what is being felt and thought.
Flexibility: Being able to deal with change and remain open to changing his ideas based on new information or changing needs.
Why are these factors important? After all, the individual should be judged according to their abilities, correct? Yes, but that’s not the whole story. Very few people work in isolation. Almost everyone works in a formal or informal community of coworkers who interact regularly with each other and need to collaborate regularly to complete their work efficiently and effectively. A high EQ can help any individual to work more effectively with others and, as a result, achieve their goals more effectively.
What are some signs that you may need to work on your EQ?
You get angry, sad, or discouraged without knowing why.
Other people tend to “get on your nerves.”
Colleagues and others seem distant or uninterested in communicating with you.
Interruptions to your plans or routines are extremely frustrating.
If any of these ring true for you, are you stuck? Are only some people born with the gift of high EQ and the others are out of luck?
The good news is that EQ can be developed. If you are interested in learning about your own emotions and how they affect your performance and your interactions with others, you can improve your EQ. You have options for improving your EQ to build your self-awareness and improve your relationships with others.
Individual assessments can start the process of understanding your own emotions and how they affect your daily functioning.
Coaching from a trained professional can help you understand yourself and the ways others perceive you.
Group assessments, such as 360-degree assessments, can help you and your colleagues understand each other better.
People are complicated. If we recognize how our emotions affect ourselves and those with whom we interact, we have taken the first step toward working with them more effectively.